I know this blog used to be more about art and pretty things, but now that I am a mother I feel it is important for me to share this part of my life too. Before becoming a mom I had these ideals of what kind of mom I would be. I was the type who would say "A baby won't change my schedule or how I do things!" etc..... I always thought a baby would just follow my routine and be just fine! Well I was in for a surprise!
After Samuel was born I found that it wasn't about ME anymore. I would do anything for this precious baby. He still gets up during the night 3 even 4 times but does that bother me, no. He needs me. He needs nourishment and comfort. He gets up at 6 or 7 AM. Does that mean I want to get up at that time? No. But I do because I love to see his smiling face and hear him giggle when he sees mine. I will never stress about whether or not he is sleeping when I want to sleep because he is just following his body's natural rhythm.
I know breast feeding is a controversial subject and to each her own, but I choose to breast feed not because it is the easiest choice (well in some instances it is when you don't have to get up and mix a bottle) but because I know it is specifically made for my baby and is best for him. This means I can only be gone from him for 2 hours tops because that's how often he eats. Once again his needs come before mine. I remember back to the first couple weeks when he would want to eat constantly and I was so overwhelmed and exhausted and at the brink of giving him a bottle. Kyle my husband encouraged me not to give up. Looking back I was just ill informed about breast feeding. I didn't know that little babies ate so often and that one of the reasons he wanted to eat was for comfort and to build up my supply. Babies need to suckle.
This post is not intended to say that you can't have a life or that you shouldn't nurture and take care of yourself as a mother. I am just saying that once you bring a little baby into this world your life will not be exactly the same as it was before. This has been my experience anyway. It will change because the love you feel for this little human is so amazing and you would do anything for them.