Oceans, Rocks, and Clouds

My almost 2 year old son is the best, most fun person to hang out with ( when he isn't tired, hungry, or having a tantrum). We went to the park today and he says: Mommy push WAY UP HIGH" So I do. Mommy, Mommy up in the clouds! Big! So I tell him he is as high as the clouds and he believes it with all his heart.

Then off into the distance he sees a small lake. "Mommy the OCEAN!" And because I don't care if he thinks the lake is the ocean and I agree. He starts running towards it, telling me he wants to find a big rock and THROW IT in the OCEAN! So we find a decent sized rock and when we get to the mucky edge of the "ocean" he whips it into the water squealing with delight. Because there are no more rocks around he seeks out a pine cone then he's off running again. 

All the wonders of nature are more entertaining to this kid than any toy I could find at the store (except of course a new ball!). I look out at the "ocean" and up into the Big Clouds and I feel so much gratitude for this little boy and this place in time. I am lucky. These moments make the other moments of being a mom, the times when I feel worn and weathered and ready to break, worth it. 

Along the wall

Here are some of my paintings lined up against the wall. I feel like I am finally fulfilling that part of myself that has been ignored since becoming a mom. I had this voice in the back of my head for the past two years saying "You need to paint again!" But I just wasn't ready until now. Now all I want to do paint! Colors are swirling in my head all night. I am not sleeping so good anymore!

It is hard to find the balance between "me" time and being a mom. I know we all have that battle though.  I have to make sure that I am a good mother first and foremost. Most of my painting is done during nap time or after he goes to sleep. I also have to say that my housework has suffered since I've been picking up my paint brushes regularly! But that can always wait till tomorrow right?

There is a call for submissions for a local art show and I was thinking about entering a few pieces. What do you think? I am scared but somewhat excited to do it. I have until the 16th to decide. 

Hello it's February already? Say what?!

Wow the new year is already flying by. Sammy and I have been having a lot of fun playing outside (the weather this winter is so mild!), painting, and eating ice cream on a daily basis. Yes it's all about fun folks. We work hard and play hard.

This new year 2012 is going to be a great year. I can feel it. I have had these dreams marinating in my heart and I'm going to make it happen. I have started to paint a lot again. It is the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last thing I think about when I go to sleep. In fact, I have started to dream about paintings and colors. It is quite amazing and I feel rejuvenated. I bought a bunch of canvases and I am having fun experimenting with no expectations. My big dream would be for me to produce a series of cohesive paintings and to present them to an art gallery. Maybe by summer I will be ready for something like this. We'll see. I put it out there in the universe and now we'll see what happens. I have felt compelled to start another blog just for my artwork. I will be posting there a lot. I hope you join me on my adventure!

Sometimes I feel like I should be doing more, making more, wanting more, being more than I already am. Maybe it's the hustle and bustle of Christmastime? Maybe it's the knowing that after the baby comes I will be limited in being able to do all the things I think I should be doing.

Then I look at my cozy cats and see that they are content to just be where they are, warm and unaffected by the driving forces that affect our human brains.

And I look down at my growing belly and feel the sweet baby moving inside of me and I realize that now is not the time to be putting unnecessary pressures on myself.

Now is just a time to enjoy and feel and soak up all the wonders in my life.

Peeling back

I feel like I am on the cusp of something very new. Behind the scenes in my work space I have been creating some very abstract little pieces of artwork that is much different than the stuff that is currently in my shop. I know that over time an artist's work evolves and changes so I am not that surprised. This new way of making is very uninhibited. I do not think so much about what I am doing. I just do. It all started as a way to warm up before diving into something bigger I was working on. I will soon share some of this work with you ;)

Today is supposed to be a hot one. My sunflowers just started to open yesterday. Little by little the green folds give away to the yellow petals that are trying to make their debut. It's funny how we are not so different from these flowers. Sometimes a seed is planted in our brains and behind the scenes we slowly manifest what it is that is about to be created in our lives. Slowly we peel back the layers so we can show to the world what it is that god/universe wants for us to share. Not sharing will limit us. If you don't show the world your gifts you cannot inspire others to live authentically and fully. So if you love to write, share your writing with someone. If you love to paint, make a painting for someone. If you love to cook, fill someone's belly!

That's all I have to say about that for today :)

Peace out

a modge podge of thoughts

me jumping on a park trail

Illinois landscape

I have been back from my trip for a few days now. It was nice to get out of my town and to visit other lands even if it was just Illinois. I have to say that I really enjoyed seeing the fireworks this year. I love our country and feel thankful to have been born here. Isn't it funny to think that you could have been born anywhere in the world which determines the quality of life you have, the amount of freedom you have, and much bigger things like your religion? It blows my socks off thinking about it. It makes me count my blessings and reminds me not to judge others so much since they are a product of their circumstances and environment.

I am loving the summer. My sunflowers are about to bloom, my grass is still green due to steady rain, and the fireflies amaze me. They are like little wonders of electricity. Wouldn't it be funny if we could light up in the dark. No that would be scary. I am glad only fireflies and some kinds of fish are the only things that light up.

Now that I am back I plan on catching up on some things like weeding my garden, mowing, and painting the bonus room above the garage. I never knew what a bonus room was until I moved to the south. They are popular in my neighborhood since none of the houses have basements. I hate not having a basement. It freaks me out when storms come, to the point that I wear a helmet when the tornado sirens go off. I am going to paint the bonus room a grey brown color called ashwood. It should be classy and look nice with my dark brown furniture. I can add color to the room with pillows, curtains, and lamps. That's the way I like to decorate. Alright off to take care of business.

Hope you all had a nice holiday weekend!!

I just started to read The Great Gatsby by J. Scott Fitzgerald. My mom and I have decided that we want to read all the classics so I dusted off an old version from 1953 that was just sitting on my shelf. I actually took it from the last apartment I lived in. There was a community bookshelf of sorts in the lobby area so one day I snatched it up. I just wanted to share a few words of wisdom I found on the first page. It is quite good advice if I say so myself.

Chapter One

In my younger  and more vulnerable years my father gave me some advice that I've been turning over in my mind ever since. 

"Whenever you feel like criticizing any one, " he told me, "just remember that all the people in the world haven't had the advantages that you've had."

Reserving Judgments is a matter of infinite hope. 

I think a lot of us want to say we are non-judgmental but even I catch myself judging other people without thinking about where they come from or why they are the way they are. I like the idea that reserving judgement is a matter of infinite hope. When we let go of judgement we are able to see the best in people. When we see the best in people we are able to show them the best part of ourselves.  Reading can teach such great lessons! 

Let Go

*Picture taken last summer in my mother-in-law's garden

Sometimes I think we expect too much from ourselves.

Let whatever you do today be enough. 

Let it be ok if you didn't get to every thing on your to do list. 

Let it be okay if you decided to finish that really good book you haven't had time for.

Let it be okay if you let the laundry sit in the basket until you wore every wrinkly thing in it and still haven't started a new load.

I think the Beatles were on to something when they wrote "Let it Be"

Seriously. Give yourself a break. 

Visit this video  by swirlygirl to be even more inspired.

Silence

“See how nature - trees, flowers, grass - grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence...we need silence to be able to touch souls.” Mother Theresa

Good morning dear friends, 

It has been a nice quiet weekend, with nothing too exciting to report. 

This morning I was greeted by the sun rise in my backyard and I had to share its beauty with you. I think it is important to have a little silence to ourselves each day. The quietest part of my day is in the morning when I first get up. I brew my own delicious batch of dunkin' donuts coffee (it is THE BEST), add my coconut creamer (also yummy) and i sit down either at my kitchen table or crawl back in my bed and sip on coffee and check all my "sites" on my mac.  

Weekends are nice, but I really love having a morning routine during the week. When I quit my job as an art teacher there was a period of time where I felt "lost" in the mornings. I didn't know whether to sleep in, get up, work on artwork, etc. For the last month I have really felt like I have found a good routine that has worked for me creatively. I use my mornings to plan the rest of my day and I go from there. I used to put pressure on myself about sitting down at a certain time to paint/draw, but now I just jot down ideas as they come to me and create when I feel most inspired to.  I do make sure that I work on something everyday even if it is just drawing some crazy flower designs with my favorite faber castell ink pens. I am so tempted to buy the gift set for myself!

What is involved in your morning routine? 

What Happens?

* Picture of me at the age of 5 with my grandma on her front porch steps. I remember thinking that this place was so magical. I always looked forward to a trip to my grandparents farm, to skip rocks in the creek, to moo at the cows, find kittens in the forbidden hayloft, and to go looking for ghosts on the "other side of the house" which was the closed off older portion of the house that was built sometime in the mid 19th century (i think). Oh, and there was a cellar door on the outside like in The Wizard of Oz! What a cool place for a kid to explore!

I have been at a loss for words about what to blog about lately. I have two custom orders I am going to be working on the next couple days and I will definitely show you the results as they are completed. 

Until then.....something to ponder about:

What happens after age nine? Because of the fear we don't trust our life, our story, or our magic

-Sabrina Ward Harrison

Gremlins

I just got done listening to an interview that Jamie Riedler, author of 12 Secrets of Highly Creative Women did of Andrea Scher, creative blogger, life coach, and jewelry designer and it was exactly what i needed to hear today. I highly recommend you listen to it even if you are not a so-called artist or creative person. The advice she offers can be applied to everyone's life. 

The point that resonates the most with me is when she discusses the"gremlins" that sneak into your mind throughout the day that constantly tell you lies such as: "you aren't really an artist" "you are not a trained photographer" "you don't really think you can write a book because you never went to school for that" "no one will appreciate your work"  " No one will want to read your blog" and so on. 

The gremlins live in all of us. I realized that no one is exempt from this. No one goes around all day every day thinking "Wow I am a super awesome human who can do anything!!" We all have doubts and fears about what path we are on and how others will view us for the decisions we make/or don't make. She explains that we need to turn off these voices or send them away so that we can be brave a dive into the project that needs to get done. 

Another part of the interview that really spoke to me is when she gives advice to artists about "showing up." She says that there is no "grand" or "perfect" time to create something. It is simply a matter of showing up and doing it. Even if you only write for 10 minutes a day or sit down with your sketchbook while you are having coffee, at least you are working toward your goal. She mentions that it is difficult to feel like you are making progress when you see someone else's finished work. For example I am always seeing these beautiful illustrations and paintings on etsy and I'm like wow how did they do that? And I picture the artist sitting down in their beautiful studio with all their amazing supplies and they skillfully paint this lovely canvas all in one grand overly inspired moment. When in reality, they probably did 20 sketches, threw out five paintings, and worked on it little by little until their hard work paid off. 

I am going to take this advice and know that it is in the moments of "showing up" that we can accomplish and work towards our goals. Any thoughts on this are appreciated :)